C'mon man, here's what you do:

1. hollow out forearm and add lead

2. hollow out stock and add lead

3. epoxy in chamber mates to turn it into a 16ga.

4. drill and tap rib to mount really cool "Quigley" sight

5. build up stock with bondo to your dimensions

6. brand you monogram into the stock, and

7. carry it in a custom tooled scabbard