When doing an oil finish, I use a high build method that leaves a skin of oil on the wood. Every few coats, I rub down with 800 W&D until I reach bare wood. After about 20 coats and some 3-4 rub downs I have a fully filled grain but a gloss finish.
I then use pumice to remove all the surface oil, still leaving the grain filled.
Providing the build up of surface oil has been removed fully on each rub down, the pumice will cut down to the wood and leave you a perfect satin finish, which in my experience does not wear glossy unless further coats of oil are applied.
Hard work but then good stock finishing is never quick nor easy.
